Soft Shoulder Shuffle By The Hook Vents

hvLast week something new shook the foundations of the sedate community of Tradsville — a rockin’ blues band called The Hook Vents.

The coolest thing about the band and their tune “Soft Shoulder Shuffle” is that the musicians were never in the recording studio together. They simply laid down their tracks individuallly and emailed them to the “producer,” who threw it all together and, voila, out came music.

The song was posted on the “Talk Ivy” forum and the virtual band consists of usernames “Zarjazz,” “Worried Man” and “Harpo.”

There are still a few things to work out as the band finds its voice. For example, the name will certainly be obscure for a larger audience (then again, weird, even nonsensical names have never seemed to hurt rock bands). There is also little confusion with the band’s iconography, as they’re called The Hook Vents but their web page is covered in Weejuns.

Congrats to band for this brilliant stroke of originality. Look for them on tour (the campus circuit) with opening act The Undarted.

Below are the lyrics to “Soft Shoulder Shuffle.” — CC

This here’s the soft shoulder shuffle, I do it all the time
The rags I wear may be old, but they’re looking mighty fine

Button down collar with a button in back, when the ladies pass by
They know I’ve really got the knack

Strides pressed and clean and barely touchin’ my shoes
With that Ivy League Look you know you just can’t lose

Herringbone tweed with a 3/2 roll
Come along baby now let’s take a little stroll

If it’s cool outside don’t you worry one bit
Just take my mohair sweater and cuddle up in it

All the cats on the street know there ain’t no other way
Gather round boys, here’s what I have to say

Do the soft shoulder shuffle
(3-2 roll)
Do the soft shoulder shuffle
(It’s good for the soul)
Do the soft shoulder shuffle
Oh yeah
You do the soft shoulder shuffle
(Come on now)
You learn the soft shoulder shuffle and you always be feeling fine

Now all you sloppy dressing silly lookin’ men
Take a lesson from me, ‘cuz I’ll say it once again

You need a flannel suit and a slim knit tie
A hopsack blazer and now you’re really gettin’ by

It’s a stubborn look, just won’t go out of style
If you follow my advice, it’s sure to make you smile

Do the soft shoulder shuffle
(Soft shoulder shuffle)
Do the soft shoulder shuffle
Oh yeah
Do the soft shoulder shuffle
(Herringbone tweed)
Do the soft shoulder shuffle
(All that you need)
You do the soft shoulder shuffle and you always be feelin’ fine

5 Comments on "Soft Shoulder Shuffle By The Hook Vents"

  1. Maybe Bobby could get them to play it at JG Melon.

  2. Roy R. Platt | August 25, 2014 at 10:06 am |

    Just wondering how this might happen…..

    “Button down collar with a button in back, when the ladies pass by
    They know I’ve really got the knack……”

    How do ladies passing by see the button in the back of the collar, particularly if one is wearing a “herringbone tweed with a 3/2 roll”?

  3. Waldo Walters | September 2, 2014 at 10:32 am |

    I dig. But that Elmore James guitar lick from Dust My Broom really needs to be in there someplace.

  4. Cringe factor 10.

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