Reflections On 60.

Today is my 60th birthday. I went to the gym, came home, showered, and put on shorts and a white ocbd. While I was doing so, it occurred to me that this is probably my most Ivy year yet.

At 60, I have some experiences and accomplishments under my belt. Of course there were mistakes and missteps, things I wish I had done differently, people I hurt, all of that. But at 60, I’ve learned to keep the lessons but let go of the shame. That’s Ivy, a tradition and history with an emphasis on the value of learning.

At 60, I have people in my life that I love more than I have ever loved anything, and I have learned over the last year what the meaning of the word family really is. Like I said, late to the party perhaps but at least I got here. I always think of that story, I told it here, when the nurse asked me why I wore a suit to take my family to chemo and I said, “because I respect what you are doing and what she is going through.” Showing respect through dress is one of the most meaningful ways. I don’t care about my earring all that much, but I do care that the people I love and the things I respect are shown that in my choice of clothes.

At 60, I have finally learned not to care that much about the negativity in the world. And it gives me a confidence I never had before. I have learned that when people are negative it is almost always about something else. Or, as my 15 year old daughter says, “Sounds like a YOU problem.” Ivy is confidence.

At 60, I am in the very strange spot of knowing that my best days are still in front of me. I credit a lot of that to the study and application of Ivy. While I am not at all perfect, I have worked hard and have prospects. Hard work is Ivy. I have developed great friendships with a diversity of people. Both friendship and diversity are Ivy. And I am taking the rest of my life seriously, but I am going to make sure it is my own and not overly serious. When I think about a student back in the hey, taking things seriously but also wearing a leather loafer without a sock, it kinda feels like that.

Most importantly, at 60 I finally understand dignity and the value of it to myself and to others. Dignity is the gateway to so many good things. May we all share dignity with each other always.

Next week, a piece on this line J. Press is offering. For a sneak peek, click here.

JB